Christmas cookies may be a distant memory now, but the effects—like the office eavesdropper—continue to linger. This, coupled with the arrival of a new swimsuit, sent me searching for yet another too-fun-to-be-exercise workout. The foremost authority on such workouts is a 6-year old child. Fortunately, I know one.
For the past month, Abby has been learning to swizzle, glide, and remain upright on ice. Under the guise of giving her additional practice, I suggested we return to the rink for the public session after her morning lesson. Her acceptance was no less enthusiastic than if I had offered her Taylor Swift tickets and a box of Thin Mints.
Little did she know I had a motive of my own. Little did she care.
Hoping to learn a trick or two for the afternoon session, I decided to pay more attention than normal (meaning no Kindle time) to the surrounding lessons. When I spied four young girls bedazzled in ponytails and teeny skate dresses, I thought I had found in them suitable trick teachers.
Not so. Skating figure eights with ease whist undoubtedly contemplating triple lutzes, they were way out of my league.
I’ll admit I’m prone to hyperbole. For example, when I wrote that a boy zipped past me clutching his woobie on the ski slope last winter, I had embellished a bit. Though a child really did zip past me, it wasn’t with woobie in hand. But I am not exaggerating about their skating skills. Nor am I exaggerating about what happened next.
Following the lesson, the littlest of the three figure skaters toddled up to her mother, accepted a proffered binky, and popped it in her mouth. A kid with a binky could skate figure eights around me. The realization, though humbling, was far from deterring.
We returned that afternoon for Abby’s stated (and my covert) mission— Abby, to practice swizzles and staying upright; and I, to mitigate the effects of Molasses Men cutouts. Joining us somewhat reluctantly was Todd, who generally prefers more life-threatening activities such as downhill skiing and mountain biking to ice skating.
If for no other reason than seeing Abby smile at her own accomplishments, the afternoon was journal-worthy memorable. But her smile wasn’t the only thing worth writing home about. Our afternoon also included the treats of observing a birthday girl and company wearing inverted cone hats on the ice, and skating hand-in-hand with Abby to her favorite (and mine), Ours.
Not all the moments were so pleasant, however. While waiting in line for our rental skates, I had to reveal my Mamma Bear claws to a boy who spat at Abby for no apparent reason. And later, Todd experienced a fall on ice that resulted in bruised ribs and an exemption from all future skating endeavors.
He’s feeling better now, mostly.
As for Abby and me, I see boxes of Thin Mints on the horizon. Therefore, I see more skating sessions in our future. I’m willing to bet Abby won’t object to either.
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These are the songs we could recall from the skate session. Any playlist that includes Lisa Loeb and Hootie is list-worthy in my book. This collection tends to be more old school than the roller rink playlist, which means some were from my college days and I didn’t have to perform extensive lyric searches to identify them. And I firmly believe Adele can sing no wrong.
Ice Rink Playlist
- “Californication”- Red Hot Chili Peppers
- “Stay”- Lisa Loeb
- “Let Her Cry”- Hootie and the Blowfish
- “Back to December”- Taylor Swift
- “Ours”- Taylor Swift
- “Fireflies”- Owl City
- “Where I Come From”- Montgomery Gentry
- “Jack and Diane”- John Mellencamp
- “Jessie’s Girl”- Rick Springfield
- “Easy”- Rascal Flatts
- “Set Fire to the Rain”- Adele
- “Dirty Little Secret”- The All-American Rejects
- “I Gotta Feeling”- The Black Eyed Peas
- “Little Too Much”- Natasha Bedingfield
